Waiting on a Man

So here I am waiting on my husband still to get done with his surgery. It is 5 and he went back at 12. Let's just say that I have extreme anxiety and panick attacks and this does not help at all. But the nurses are awesome and keep me updated as much as they can so I shall sit here and wait and blog. Heck what else is there to do???

With Day 5 I can once again relate to the message. Today it is Desperation breeds defeat. I have done that so many times in my life. My favorite part of the reading was this

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

I am always tempted by food and I can always seem to find a way to justify a reason to eat it so i won't feel so bad. Well I don't feel bad emotionally but physically I end up feeling like crap! But I see a change. Normally during this time with John in the hospital I would be finding food to stuff in my mouth just to feel better! Have I been perfect? Nope. But I have been better.

I am not eating out all 3 meals. Today I stopped at Chick Fil A and got a chicken sandwich. Before this I would have gotten a #1 Large with a sweet tea and pour on the mayo. Not this time. Could I have made a better choice? Ofcourse I could! I get that. But if it was that easy to reprogram yourself I would be a size 5 by now! You have to take the small steps sometimes and be happy with that and for once I am.

Tomorrow John should be coming home and him coming home is a new fresh start for the both of us. I have been trying to lose this weight since 2008 and I got even heavier once I had our son in 2010. There was a time though when i was healthy, loved the gym, ate well, and had a personal trainer. So I know the do's and don'ts I have just choosen not to use them.  So first thing will be a pantry raid! All the processed crap needs to go! 2nd is to bury the fryer! Yea I have a fryer in my house, My dad brought it when he moved in with us and I have hated it and since he leaves for Alabama tomorrow it is gone!

Before all of this though I am ready for some "me" time. So tonight I am going to color my hair and I bought some new makeup and a new outfit for tomorrow and I am going to take pride in myself again.

Hey he is finally out and now wants to eat! That is my hubby so take out it is but fried food it won't!

xoxoxo,
Kelly